953 Arranged Marriage
Enam talks about arranged marriage in Bangladesh and how he feels about it.
Enam: Yes, it is true. We still have arranged marriages but the number of arranged marriages are declining these days because students, or even you can say young generation, don't like this custom anymore. They want to choose their own bride or groom by themselves, but yeah, we still have this arranged marriage in our villages where the bride doesn't know the groom and the groom doesn't even know the bride. Their parents just arrange the marriage and introduce them for two days or a few weeks, they just get to know each other, maybe just little talks ... then they just get married. Everything starts after the marriage.
Katia: Wow! That is so interesting, but what about you? How do you feel about it?
Enam: Actually, I have decided not to go for arranged marriage, and I have already talked with my mom and she said, " OK, you can choose your own bride" ... but tell me Katia, what would you do if you were in Bangladesh and you had to do arranged marriage? Suppose you are in Bangladesh. You are a Bangladeshi girl and your parents are asking you to marry a guy they choose for you.
Katia: Well, I would really trust my parents that they would choose the best thing for me, however if I would meet somebody else before they did, I would probably want to choose my own husband, but then it would also be interesting to understand my parents and because I know they would want the best thing for me, but it's a little bit difficult question.
Enam: So, Katia, do you have arranged marriages in Mexico? Or you don't have?
Katia: Actually, not really. Mexican boys, Mexican girls ... they fall in love and many times actually they go against the parents and that's actually common in the movies. So, no arranged marriages in Mexico. But Enam, I'm very curious, how do arranged marriages happen? How do they work?
Enam: Well, it's kind of interesting I think because the match makers often study about the family backgrounds, their values and their perceptions, everything, and when they see that this two persons have the same, kind of, values, and they share the same level of understanding, then they talk with the parents and always both the man and woman has a chance to talk about the values and how to think about the lives and that then they decide whether to get married or not.
Katia: That is so interesting.
There are still arranged marriages in Bangladesh.
An arranged marriage is when our parents choose whom we will marry. Notice the following.
- Arranged marriages are not common in the west.
- My grand parents had an arranged marriage.
The number of arranged marriages is declining.
'Decline' means to become less in amount or fewer in number. Here are two samples.
- The number of big families is declining in my country.
- Because of the internet, CD sales are declining.
When we begin to feel love for someone or something we 'fall in love'. Notice the samples.
- My brother fell in love with Britney Spears when he was a kid.
- I fell in love with Thai food the first time I tried it.
Match makers study the values and perceptions of families.
'Values and perceptions' are what we believe is right and wrong in life. Here are some samples
- Different cultures have different values and perceptions.
- My best friend is Japanese. We have different values and perceptions, but get along well.
They can't decide whether to get married or not.
'Whether or not' simply means 'yes or no'. Notice the sample sentences.
- I'm not sure whether or not to study abroad.
- She isn't sure weather or not to buy a laptop.
Below are some more great lessons!
fell in love • value • whether or not